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You have your own rhythm, I have my own rhythm.

Some of the MentorHerGhana girls I work with on Tuesdays are really good students. They listen, they answer questions, they add valuable inputs to every session. I can see that if I were to give them homework, they would complete it and submit it on time.

Now, I am doing a research project with them. In small groups, they searched their chosen topics online. They created research questions and eventually they will present their findings.

Two of the girls that always stand out are in the same group. They told me they were already done with their research project. I was surprised, because it should have taken a little bit more time to do it properly.

But, hey, who am I? Maybe they really were ready.

I could see they felt good to be “the first group” to finish. And, I could see other girls looking worried or pressured as if they needed to be ready too.

When I checked the presentation of this group, I was honestly impressed to see how quickly they learned the computer skills I had taught them, found information and images, and created a presentation. I told them this.

Also, I could see they had worked too fast and made some mistakes. I had some feedback on how they could make their project better. When I told them, I could see on their faces that they were disappointed, as they thought they were ready.

When I walked away I could see their disappointed faces turn towards the laptop again. Their motivation came back quickly, they continued their work and didn’t give up.

I passed by the other groups and I was also impressed by how fast they were learning. Some were taking their time to make beautiful presentations that were thought through.

Why am I telling you this story?

Two things:

1. You have your own rhythm, I have my own rhythm. Everyone has their own rhythm. We have the tendency to compare ourselves with others. But it’s not about being the first in life, or being “the best” (what does that even mean?). It’s about staying on track, staying on your path, creating your thing, honoring your pace and believing that everything is happening exactly at the time that it needs to happen.

2. Growth doesn’t always feel nice. The girls thought they were ready, then it seemed they weren’t and needed to find new motivation to work on it again. For us too, sometimes we think we have learned our lesson, and then we are disappointed that it shows up again in our lives. Or sometimes things don’t work out the way how we want it… then it can be difficult to take another direction or find energy to continue.

What I can tell you is that it is not difficult to gracefully follow your own path, honor your pace, create your thing, and move through growth.

It just takes one thing: deciding that you will honor yourself and do whatever it takes to reach the other side :-)

And, of course, growth is a life-long process.

Many times, it is about going through your (deep or old) emotions, healing from childhood pains & getting insights or getting to know yourself better so you can confidently stand in who you are.

If you want to dive deeper in yourself, check out my offerings.


This text was shared in Ama's newsletter on April 18th, 2023.


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