Connecting with your inner child can be comforting, and bring you change and healing. It's not only about wounds or traumas, your inner child also carries great wisdom & remembers what your purpose is! But what exactly is your inner child? And in what ways can you connect with it? In this article, I provide you with three different ways of connecting with your inner child in a creative way.
What is your inner child?
Inside of us, the child that we were years ago still lives within us. We have grown. We live in
adult bodies now. But that doesn’t mean that child is gone. A lot of times we still carry certain wounds from when we were young. This is different for everyone, but we all have certain pieces within us that arise when we are triggered. It is almost as if sometimes the child comes to the forefront and takes over, and the adult disappears for a while.
Wounded inner child
When there is a conflict between two people, the wounded inner child in both parties takes over, and it can be very difficult to resolve the conflict. (That’s one of the reasons I created the Conflict Resolution Ceremony).
When the wounded child is the one at the forefront, everything that is being said goes through the filter of this wounded child. A lot of emotions arise. Often, alarm bells are going off and the situation can appear dangerous. Sometimes, it can be difficult to think or act in a mature way. It takes some training to be self-aware of the fact that you are in the ‘wounded child’ state, and that your inner child is asking for attention.
Why you should connect with your inner child.
The more you connect with your inner child, get to know it and give it attention, the more it will be able to heal parts of you that would otherwise ask for attention in certain situations.
It’s important to note that your inner child is not only about wounds, traumas, or destructive things that happened to you when you were younger.
Your inner child also carries great wisdom!!
It is connected to your higher self, it still remembers why you came to Earth, what your purpose in this life is, and what you like or dislike.
So, if you feel like you don’t know your purpose, feel lost, feel disconnected, or are in doubt about who they are or what they are meant to do, connecting with your inner child is a great way to discover these parts of yourself again.
Creative ways to connect with your inner child
There are plenty of ways to connect with your inner child. Honestly, they are countless! Our inner children are more creative than we are. This means there are a lot of possibilities to connect with them.
In this article, we explore three different ways of connecting with your inner child. Feel free to try these out or freestyle! You can choose to go in the process completely open without any expectation, or you can choose to put an intention, like “I want to explore my talents” or “I want to heal my insecurity.”
1. Art: Drawing or painting with your inner child
Get papers and different colored pencils, markers, or paint. Whatever feels good to you. Sit somewhere that feels good and comfortable to you, ideally somewhere you can feel more playful. Before you start creating, close your eyes, breathe in and out a few times, and put your hand on your heart. You can say your intention to yourself. This intention can be very specific, or it can be a general one. In any case, make sure you talk to your inner child. Let it know that you are taking the time to hang out together and that you are looking forward to it. You can invite the inner child to paint or draw through you.
Then just start drawing or painting, whatever you feel is coming through you. This is not about a result. It is the creative process and connection with your inner child that counts. There is no judgment or praise about what you paint, everything is welcome. The drawing or painting doesn’t need to be perfect, it does not need to be corrected. You can show respect for yourself and your inner child by welcoming everything that comes through with love.
If you want to take this exercise further, you can repeat it for a few days after one another. You can draw or paint freely, but you can also ask the inner child every day again how old it is and if it wants to draw itself. You can get very different children every day: some might be sad, others happy. But it can give you some insight into the world of your inner child.
2. Writing: Write a letter between your adult self and inner child
There are different ways you can use writing in inner child work. One of the ways you can use writing to connect with your inner child is to start writing intuitively. Get a notebook or some paper and a pen to write, and pick out a space that feels good to you. As above, first close your eyes, make a connection with the inner child and bring your intention forward. If you are ready, just start writing. Try not to stop. When you pause too long, there is a chance you’ll start overthinking and will write less from your intuitive, inner child side, and more from your rational ‘adult’ side. Just write, whatever comes up, even if it doesn’t make sense or feels like gibberish. Observe how your body feels when you are ready. Then you can leave everything you wrote at the side for a while. You can let it rest or sink in. You can read what you wrote the next day or week again and see what you can learn from it.
Another way to start the writing process is to write a letter to your inner child. Again a general letter or with a specific intention. In this letter, your adult self is speaking. You can tell your inner child what you are currently feeling, what you are struggling with, which questions you have, what you want to heal. You can also ask your inner child questions. Basically, whatever you feel or want to say, is what you can write in this letter. When you are done writing this letter, there are two options:
you can stop here
or you write a letter back to the adult self—this time tuning into the inner child. You just let your hand write. You may be surprised about what your inner child is telling you or sharing with you!
3. Visualization: Asking Inner Child what it wants to do
This last exercise is a very fun one because you don’t know in the beginning how it will go, and how it will end. In this exercise, your inner child is taking the lead! The child within you knows what it wants! And it loves when you give it space for it to choose what it wants to do.
For this exercise, close your eyes, you breathe in and out a few times, until you feel really relaxed. You can ask your inner child to come to the forefront. Maybe you see it visually, maybe you feel its presence, or maybe you just know it is there. You can also put your hand on your heart and talk to your inner child. You could say: “Hello inner child, I have some time now, and I would like to spend it with you. I was wondering: what do you feel like doing?”
And then you wait. Maybe an answer will come right away. Maybe it will take a while before an answer comes. It might be that your inner child feels sad and needs comfort or a hug. Maybe it feels playful and wants to play a game. Maybe it wants to dance, or maybe it wants to eat an ice cream. Whatever comes up, try to act on it. If your inner child wants to dance, go and dance and dedicate that time to your inner child! If it wants to eat an ice cream, go and eat an ice cream. If it wants to cry, go somewhere comfortable and give it space for its emotions.
Can everyone connect with their inner child?
All of this might sound a bit weird. Maybe you are like, “yeah, hello, I will just be talking to myself.” But I can assure you, in the inner child work I do with people, I’ve never met someone who wasn’t able to feel, see or know what their inner child was needing or wanting.
And a lot of times they were so surprised afterwards what the child came up with. The needs from the child can be very different from what the adult needs or wants. Using your intuition to tune into your inner child, is one of the most creative ways of connecting with your inner child.
Some things that might come up in trying these exercises and what you can do:
Take some time to really connect with your inner child. Some inner children are afraid of the adult self or don’t feel safe (in this case, connecting with your inner child is even more important. Make it an intention to start with!). Don’t force the inner child but respect its pace.
Take time to get comfortable with receiving insights or messages. Maybe you don’t trust your intuition, or maybe doubt comes a lot to the forefront. Don’t worry. It is just practice. Every time you choose to believe what you see or feel, you train your intuition-muscle.
If you have some creative blocks and can’t freely go into these creative exercises, this could be a perfect start to ask your inner child some help for. You could put the intention to lift all the creative blocks that are present within you & see from there what happens. It can be so simple and at the same time really bring change!
Are you ready to try one of these exercises? I wish you good luck and a lot of fun! And ice creams! ;-)
If it is difficult for you to connect with your inner child alone, or if there are deeper themes you feel you want to work around or heal, you know where to find me for a one on one inner child session. I would be more than happy to guide you into this inner child journey.